I know. We are 8 months into a pandemic, the numbers are terrifying, people are being stupid, and we are all so, so weary of all this. Still, we can’t let up with our precautions and our isolation. It’s hard. If you are someone who works in healthcare or are otherwise considered essential, it’s even harder.
This is where we need to be resilient.
Resilience is defined by psychologists as the ability to bounce back from adversity or trauma, sometimes even stronger and better than before.
Something that is brittle will break under pressure or stress – if you knock a glass off a table onto a tiled floor, chances are it will shatter, never to be put back together again. But a rubber ball will bounce back up, despite having been temporarily deformed by its contact with the floor.
How do we become the rubber ball and not the glass?
Resilience is not a magical trait, only possessed by the few. It is something we can nurture and develop.
It is not the case that resilient people don’t feel pain and grief. They do. The difference is that they seek out ways to support themselves and others through the hard times, often emerging more powerful and full of determination. That is what we want.
One of the hardest things about these times is the requirement to be isolated. That goes against one of the strongest ways to develop resilience – relying on community. Fortunately, if you can read this, it means you have access to the Internet. Find your people online, call them on the phone, love them hard. You are not actually alone, even though it feels like it.
Another important component of resilience is taking care of yourself. Pay attention to your sleep, your nutrition, your exercise. Try to get out of the house for a walk every day if you can. If not, try to find some way to move your body anyway. Exercise is the best antidepressant there is.
If you find yourself overwhelmed with the daily numbers and the crazies online, monitor your media consumption. Turn off the news, curate your social media feed. You don’t have to cut it back to people who agree with you, but try to reduce the negativity in your life. Humans already have a tendency to go for the negative thought first, don’t reinforce that.
Most importantly, see if you can help somebody. The best way to be resilient is to support someone else. If you can’t help in person, donate if you can. All the food banks are staggering under reduced donations and skyrocketing demand. Pick up the phone and make someone’s day.
What are you doing to improve your resilience in these difficult times?