If you follow me at all, you have heard me talk about Mel Robbins and her excellent coaching. She has just come out with a new book called The High 5 Habit, and it’s all about getting ourselves through difficult times by self-encouragement (symbolised by giving yourself a high  five in the mirror every morning) and improving our self-talk.

There’s no question that most people talk to themselves in ways they would never dream of talking to someone else, especially someone they loved. Mel concludes from this that most of us actually hate ourselves. That’s a scary thought. Why would we do that?

Babies are born loving themselves – when they see themselves in the mirror, they giggle and smile and wave. Somewhere along the line we somehow internalise the idea that we are fatally flawed, that we are fundamentally unlovable. That we are broken. Even those of us who were not abused in childhood seem to expect unreasonable standards from ourselves, even if we don’t impose those standards on anyone else. 

I have heard Mel’s coaching before, and I’m excited to see where she goes with this. I’m planning to take her High 5 Challenge, and I’ll be sure to report back. For now, let me repeat to you what she says in her book: you are not broken.

It’s OK to want to make changes – to your finances, to your body, to your circumstances. Just be sure that you are doing this from a place of love, because you want to make things better, and not as a punishment because you think you deserve to be deprived and hurt.

You deserve better.